28 Jan 2020

Exciting and Empowering Birth experience

After many years of trying for a baby, we got pregnant. We miscarried with our first pregnancy so we’re extremely worried from the beginning once we got pregnant again. Rose and I hadn’t discussed the birth until it got closer to the time and although I felt pretty calm about everything and had always wanted the ‘full’ birth experience, I could tell that Rose was unsure how she could help me and if anything happened that we didn’t expect, how we might handle that together.

Due to it being an IVF pregnancy and also shared motherhood (where we used Rose’s eggs and donor sperm) we were consultant led throughout the whole pregnancy to ensure that the baby was growing. Although at 36 weeks, we asked to go back to midwife led care so that we could have the opportunity of potentially giving birth at the meadow birth centre. As I was positive for Group B Strep, we still didn’t know if the Meadow would be available to us. The consultant was happy to sign this off as baby looked well and we then started to look at our birth plan. I wanted to give birth vaginally, without any drugs if possible, but understood through hypnobirthing that birth may take turns that could lead to the birth being different to what ywe set out for.

On the morning of 26th January, I had the ‘bloody show’, which me and Rose found weirdly exciting, but tried to remain calm as we didn’t want too much adrenaline going on. We saw family, watched our favourite TV shows, and even went to the Jinney Ring. We kept relaxed and carried on with our normal daily activities. On the evening of the 27th January, I started to feel what I can only describe as period cramps and didn’t know whether that was what people were talking about it in regards to how surges felt. Rose set up the oils in the living room and we asked Alexa to play our favourite songs whilst we danced on our landing (our happy place!)

At around 10pm, we called Triage as I lost a little blood. They advised to have a bath and that it is likely to just be part of the ‘show’. They told us that if I lose any more to call them. At that point, I ran a bath and Rose managed to get a cheeky nap in. I woke her a couple of hours later and from that point on she was in control of timing what we thought may have been surges and the TENS machine (this was amazing!!). She had found her key role for sure and it massively helped. I think the boost button was our best friend for a good 12 hours. After going to the toilet again and seeing a little more blood, we were asked to go into triage so they could check me over. Once there at around 6am on 28th January, they checked everything and advised that I was 5cm so I could head down to the Meadow birth centre. At this point, I was still having the same sensations but with the tens machine and breathing techniques, it felt manageable. Also, Rose and I just stared into each other’s eyes for the whole process which I think calmed me and made me feel safe.

Once down at the Meadows, a student midwife looked after us, checking our baby’s heartbeat every 15 minutes (which I barely noticed as I was in the zone) whilst Rose set up the room. They completely respected the birth plan that we had given them and it felt like we were all singing from the same hymn sheet. They asked us if we wanted a speaker whilst Rose proceeded to get her own set of speakers for our playlist that she made, aromatherapy oil diffuser and oils out so she replied ‘don’t worry, I’ve brought some things’. The student midwife said ‘wow, you’re prepared aren’t you?’! But why wouldn’t you be prepared for the biggest day of your life (that’s what Anna says anyway).

I stayed out of the water as I wasn’t sure that it was something that I was interested in and just kept going with the tens machine and the oils until around 4pm on the 28th January. I kept bouncing on my ball and remembering my affirmation - ‘our baby is ready to join our adventure’. One of the midwives offered for the pool to be turned on in the late afternoon and I thought that I may as well give it a go and see if it makes the sensations any different. It made me feel calm and I even managed to have a little sleep to which the student midwife and Rose were very surprised. The only tricky thing that I had to contend with was the cannula in my hand for the duration (especially in the water) so that they could administer the antibiotics for the Group B Strep. Whenever I had a surge, I breathed through it and stared into Rose’s eyes whilst she counted the surges up and down. I had gas and air when I felt like the sensations started to change and this helped to take the edge off whilst my baby was moving down. At 7:30pm, I gave birth vaginally in a birthing pool in the Poppy Suite at the Meadow Birth Centre. Our beautiful boy, Forrest, came with lots of hair and a calm and happy disposition. We feel that this could have been down to a calm pregnancy and birth. We enjoyed the whole experience and definitely did it as a team. All three of us.

Due to the hypnobirthing course that we did, we would have been completely happy with any style of birth because we were positive and prepared for that day. We thank Anna for all of the help that she gave us leading up to the biggest day of our lives and we definitely had a positive birth experience.