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18 Mar 2021
Our birth that didn't go to plan that was still AMAZING!
How Annabelle was born - the birth that didn't go to plan but was still an amazing experience
Before joining Anna's hypnobirthing course the thought of home birth was an absolute no no. It also wasn't something I was particularly looking forward to as all I heard about birth was horrible, painful, going on forever type of stories. But one taster session with Anna later and I was hooked and pretty much changed my mind about the whole experience straight away.
All was set for home birth, including the pool. We were trying to not focus on a 'due date' but Annabelle was one week over and nothing was happening. So I tried a few things to help her along, mainly lots of walking which I think was what got things going in the end.
On a Tuesday evening I started feeling period like pains which gradually got stronger but very much bearable during the night and through Wednesday. They felt like waves, it was quite a fascinating experience. I could feel them build, get to the peak and then suddenly disappear. Me and my husband Alex had this mad rush of energy where we felt the need to tidy up the house, have a good shower, I managed to dye my eyebrows and do my nails. We just felt we needed to be fresh and clean to welcome our daughter. It was quite funny really!
By the evening the waves got quite intense so we called the community midwives who came over. Alex got the living room ready, put up some fairy lights, blew up and filled the pool so I could get in. The water was great and I used gas and air which helped massively. As the night went on, the surges got stronger but the labour wasn't really progressing. In my birth plan I said I didn't want to know how dilated I was but in the end we discussed it because of the slow progress. My waters eventually broke at 1:55 am on Thursday morning which made us really excited, thinking this was it, she would soon come. But by 3 am there was still no change and we made the decision to call an ambulance as there wasn't much else anyone could do.
The transfer wasn't the most pleasant, partly because of having to be on my back and also my waters continuing to gush out of me! But the ambulance crew were absolutely amazing, keeping me calm and relaxed as much as possible.
When we got to hospital, I temporarily lost it. I think the sense of failure took over me and I just cried as it didn't go to our plan. But everyone was lovely, Alex helped me focus back on the events and we decided to try pethidine to give me a bit of rest and pain relief. I was strapped to a monitor and also put on the syntocinon drip to help speed things up. By the time the pethidine wore off, the surges were extremely powerful and I opted for an epidural.
I was being checked on every 4 hours initially and then 2 for dilation which was happening but super slow. The baby was not showing any signs of distress and that's why everyone was happy for me to carry on as I was. I basically spent the whole of Thursday waiting to dilate, centimetre by centimetre and resting. The baby kept moving down and then going back up again and no one knew why.
As it got to the evening and we were still only at around 8 cm I honestly thought we would end up with a caesarean birth. Finally at 7pm the doctor came and announced I was 10 cm and to try and push! So I did. Again the baby moved down with each surge but then went back up again. At this point I was offered to either use forceps or continue pushing but I knew deep down that pushing itself wouldn't be enough. So with the help of forceps Annabelle was born only after two pushes, looking at everyone with her big blue eyes as soon as her head came out!
I wanted delayed cord clamping but it turned out the cord was so short they hardly managed to put her on my tummy so Alex got to cut it soon after. That was also the reason for her not being able to descend down properly, the cord kept pulling her back up. But she was born healthy, happy and with no lasting problems.
So despite wanting a relaxed home birth, with no intervention, no strong pain relief or having to be on my back - I got all of those! And despite the labour lasting two days I can honestly say that apart from my little wobble after the transfer to hospital, none of it felt traumatic.
Thanks to Anna's course where we learned about the BRAIN tool we were always making informed decisions about everything the midwives and doctor suggested. I used my breathing techniques throughout the two days, to relieve discomfort and also to make myself think clearly about the pain relief and other interventions that had to be done. Otherwise I know I would probably have panicked and lost it.
I can't also praise Alex enough. He has been my rock, completely involved in the whole birthing process right from the beginning. He 100% made sure that he knew what to do on the day, wrote himself notes, breathed with me through my surges. He was my voice when I needed him to be, he kept me calm, looked after me, fed me and made sure we were not forced into something we didn't want to do. And that's all thanks to Anna's course.
We felt prepared, informed and in control. The hospital staff were amazing and respected our requests as much as possible. Annabelle was born at 7:24pm on Thursday, exactly two days after it all started. For us, even though we didn't get the birth we planned, we got an amazing experience and don't regret any decisions. None of us feel traumatised and we often talk about it as it is something that we will remember forever. It was quite a magical time.
Anna thank you so much again, I am really glad I came across your page and was able to feel the way I did about birth.
Your support has been amazing!!
Veronika and Alex - Droitwich, Worcestershire